Humdinger

the doorbell rings
while I am on the toilet.
I yell that I'll be right there,
but it rings again. 

I can't wipe fast enough,
and the doorbell rings again,
so I curse and flush,
neglecting to wash my hands.

upon opening the door,
I want to shake the hand
of the man chiming in,
but he is now just an Amazon box. 

I open up the box
with a keyknife,
and buried inside
are beautiful books. 

back to the toilet,
I crack one open,
and read about peaceful warriors,
then the doorbell rings again.