the weight of circles closing

to me,
a poem is
just an upside 
down song

I haven't 
figured out
Lauren's grace

or why
some days 
are good

and some days
are bad
while others
are just days

yesterday I was confident
January I was shitting blood
and today I am missing my sister

but I didn't 
think about 
death once
this week

refuse the past
be patient 
with the future

I only vocalize
a fraction
of what I internalize.